T-boy Boudreaux

> T-boy Boudreaux finally decides to take a vacation. He books himself on a
> Caribbean cruise and proceeds to have the time of his life until the boat
> sank.
>
> He found himself swept up on the shore of an island with no other people, no
> supplies.. Nothing. Only bananas and coconuts.
>
> After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most
> gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to him. In disbelief, he asks her,
> 'Where you come from? How you get here?'
>
> 'I rowed over from the other side of the island,' she says. 'I landed here
> when my cruise ship sank.'
>
> 'Dat's amazing,' he says. 'You was really lucky to have a rowboat wash up
> wit you.'
>
> 'Oh, this? ' replies the woman. 'I made the rowboat out of raw material found
> on the island. I whittled the oars from gum tree branches; I wove the bottom
> from palm bra nches; and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree.'
>
> 'But ... but .. dat's impossible,' stutters T-boy. 'You ain't had no tools
> or hardware. How you manage dat?'
>
> 'Oh, no problem,' replies the woman. 'On the South side of the island, there
> is a very unusual strata of alluvial rock exposed. I found if I fired it to
> a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into forgeable ductile iron. I
> used that for tools and used the tools to make the hardware.' T-boy is
> stunned.
>
> 'Let's row over to my place,' she says.
>
> After a few minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf. As T-boy
> looks onto shore, he nearly falls out of the boat. Before him is a stone
> walk leading to an exq uisite bungalow painted in blue and white. While the
> woman ti es up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, he can only
> stare ahead, dumbstruck.
&g t;
> As they walk into the house, she says casually, 'It's not much, but I call
> it home. Sit down, please. Would you like to have a drink?'
>
> 'No, no tank you,' he says, still dazed. 'Can't take no mo of dat coconut
> juice.'
>
> 'It's not coconut juice,' the woman replies. 'I built a still. How about a
> Pina Colada?'
>
> Trying to hide his continued amazement, he accepts, and they sit down on her
> hand-woven couch to talk. After they have exchanged their stories, the woman
> announces, 'I'm going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you
> like to take a shower and shave? There is a razor upstairs in the cabinet in
> the bathroom.'
>
> No longer questioning anything, T-boy goes into the ba throom. There, in the
> cabinet, is a razor made from a bone handle. Two shells honed to a
> hollow-ground edge are fastened on to its end inside of a sw ivel mechanism.
> 'WOW! dis woman is amazing,' he muses, 'what gonna be next?'
>
> When he returns, she greets him wearing 'nothing but vines' strategically
> positioned, and smelling faintly of gardenias. She beckons for him to sit
> down next to her.
>
> 'Tell me,' she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, 'We've been
> out here for a really long time. I know you've been lonely. There's
> something I'm sure you really feel like doing right now, something you've
> been longing for all these
> months. You know...'
>
> She stares into his eyes. He can't believe what he's hearing!
>
> 'You mean ...', he swallows excitedly, 'We gonna watch the LSU game from
> here'?
>