Forums
NautiqueParts.comGet Your 2025 CCF Calendar Now
  New Posts New Posts RSS Feed - “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?”
  FAQ FAQ  Forum Search   Register Register  Login Login

“Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?”

 Post Reply Post Reply   
Author
Waterdog View Drop Down
Grand Poobah
Grand Poobah
Avatar

Joined: April-27-2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 2020
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Waterdog Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?”
    Posted: February-04-2011 at 2:41pm

An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a barstool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?”



The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, “Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it’s only fair, given that you’re blind, that you should know five things:



1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat;

2. The bouncer is a blonde girl;

3. I’m a 6-foot-tall, 175-pound blonde with a black belt in karate;

4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter; and

5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.”

“Now, think about it seriously, Cowboy. Do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?”



The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, “No, not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times."
- waterdog -

78 Ski Tique

Back to Top
Hollywood View Drop Down
Moderator Group
Moderator Group
Avatar

Joined: February-04-2004
Location: Twin Lakes, WI
Status: Offline
Points: 13519
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Hollywood Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February-04-2011 at 3:39pm
Back to Top
86BFN View Drop Down
Gold Member
Gold Member
Avatar

Joined: July-28-2008
Location: Indiana
Status: Offline
Points: 882
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote 86BFN Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February-04-2011 at 8:35pm
Very Good!
👣 Steve
86 Barefoot Nautique

89 Martinique
Former Owner: 93 Hydrodyne 350 MAG
Back to Top
MartyMabe View Drop Down
Grand Poobah
Grand Poobah
Avatar

Joined: February-21-2006
Location: High Point,NC
Status: Offline
Points: 3991
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MartyMabe Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February-05-2011 at 1:19am
66 Skylark
93 SN
If you're not living in NC, you're just camping out!
Back to Top
MartyMabe View Drop Down
Grand Poobah
Grand Poobah
Avatar

Joined: February-21-2006
Location: High Point,NC
Status: Offline
Points: 3991
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MartyMabe Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February-08-2011 at 12:45am
An elderly couple in their 80's went 2 a sex therapist office and asked the doctor 2 watch them have sex. The doc is so amazed at such an elderly couple wanting sexual advise that he agrees. After watching them, the doc says there is absolutely nothing wrong with the way u have sex. He charges them $50 and they go on their way. The couple returns the next week and ask the doc 2 watch them have sex after several wks of this the doc finally asked the couple what they wanted him 2 find out. The old man replies "we're not trying to find out anything." I'm married so we can't go 2 my house, she's married so we can't go 2 her house. The Holiday Inn charges $98 the Hilton charges $139. We do it here 4 $50 and Medicare pays $43 of it leaving me 2 pay only $7 to get some ass! And since ur the doctor its confidential!!
66 Skylark
93 SN
If you're not living in NC, you're just camping out!
Back to Top
jbear View Drop Down
Grand Poobah
Grand Poobah
Avatar

Joined: January-21-2005
Location: Lake Wales FL.
Status: Offline
Points: 8193
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jbear Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February-08-2011 at 1:50am
dog and Marty...LOL!!!!
"Loud pipes save lives"



AdamT sez "I'm Canadian and a beaver lover myself"...
Back to Top
Kristof View Drop Down
Grand Poobah
Grand Poobah
Avatar

Joined: October-08-2007
Location: Bree, Belgium
Status: Offline
Points: 3399
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kristof Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February-08-2011 at 6:36am
Andy and Marty... Really great jokes!!


- Gun control means: using BOTH hands!
- Money doesn't make one happy, but when it rains cats and dogs, it's still better to cry in a Porsche than on a bicycle...

Back to Top
harddock View Drop Down
Platinum Member
Platinum Member
Avatar

Joined: June-04-2008
Location: Toontown, MA
Status: Offline
Points: 1763
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote harddock Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February-08-2011 at 7:43am
Man goes to little country doc and finds out he has a terrible disease. Not believing the doc he asks for a second opinion. The dog brings in his dog who sniffs the man and starts to bark. That confirms it says the doc the dog is never wrong. I don't believe a dog says the man, so the the doc send in his cat who nuzzles up to the man and starts neowing. The doc says, Yup worst case I've ever seen. He then hands the man a bill for $2,500. $2,500 for an office visit? shouts the man. Doc says oh no the office visit is $500, $1,000 for the lab work,and another $1,000 for the cat scan.
Back to Top
MartyMabe View Drop Down
Grand Poobah
Grand Poobah
Avatar

Joined: February-21-2006
Location: High Point,NC
Status: Offline
Points: 3991
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MartyMabe Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March-12-2011 at 12:11pm
A redneck family from the hills around Cherry Valley, Arkansas was visiting the city and they were in a mall for the first time in their lives.

The father and son were strolling around while the wife shopped. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.

The boy asked, 'Paw, what's at?'

The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, 'Son, I dunno.

I ain't never seen anything like that in my entire life, I ain't got no idea'r what it is.

While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button.

The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room.

The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small circular number above the walls light up sequentially.

They continued to watch until it reached the last number and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order.

Then the walls opened up again and a gorgeous, voluptuous 24 year-old blonde woman stepped out.

The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son, Boy..................go gitcha momma'




66 Skylark
93 SN
If you're not living in NC, you're just camping out!
Back to Top
Donald80SN View Drop Down
Grand Poobah
Grand Poobah


Joined: January-12-2009
Location: Denver, NC
Status: Offline
Points: 3896
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Donald80SN Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March-12-2011 at 12:30pm
Marty,

Exactly, where is the mall with that elevator? I need to take my wife shoping.

Donald
Back to Top
harddock View Drop Down
Platinum Member
Platinum Member
Avatar

Joined: June-04-2008
Location: Toontown, MA
Status: Offline
Points: 1763
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote harddock Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March-12-2011 at 3:56pm
A woman asker her husband his opinion on her making her breasts larger. He says, " just rub a piece of toilet paper between them every day" She asks, "just what will that do?"
He responds, " Look what it did for your butt"
Back to Top
 Post Reply Post Reply
  Share Topic   

Forum Jump Forum Permissions View Drop Down

Copyright 2025 | Bagley Productions, LLC